I used to blog without a purpose, with a wrong motivation, a wrong inspiration and a wrong strategy (imitating others). But, blogging has been very kind to me, teaching me lessons I know I’ll never learn in schools and making me realize things I would have never realized had I not been blogging.
Whenever I look at my sidebar and see that I’ve started this blog in 2009 (although I originally started it through multiply, circa 2007), I realize how much I love to write, not for money because I wasn’t earning a cent until recently, not for fame nor social status because it is only this year that I’ve decided to fully own and claim my blogs but for the sheer pleasure of writing. I realize too that it’s the thing I’m most passionate about. Usually, I’ll be interested into an object or topic to a point of obsession and then suddenly lose all enthusiasm. But not when it comes to writing. I may have failed to write regularly or brilliantly but that’s only because I’m foremost a finance person in a corporate world. Writing is one thing I always go back to. It seems I cannot let go this part of myself.
Great Blogging Lessons and Realizations
I learned so much about myself through blogging. Of course, the process was long, tedious, painful even at some point. But slowly, it led me to who I am, to who I want to be and to what I think God wants me to be. I used to blog about things that others were blogging about, things like a review of beauty products and fashion trends and mix-matches — things that I really don’t give a damn. Manicures, pedicures, hair rebonding, spa massages and what have you, no I’m not interested with those. I tried to write about those because they were trendy at some point but thankfully I’ve come to accept and love my unique self that I no longer force myself into liking things I do not really care about. It took time but I’m glad this stage has come just about when I am truly ready — in God’s perfect timing ika nga. Not only because blogging is now diversified but mainly because I’ve come to know what I want to write about, what I’m good at, what I could fairly give to the world and what makes me happy. The process took years but meaningful, nonetheless.
Blogging healed me, somehow. It saved me from the world and most especially from my self. It made me realize the good and unique things about myself. It made me embrace the beautiful creation that I am. It taught me that comparing myself and competing with others won’t make me a better person and that I have to cultivate my unique ideas instead. Along with aging, it diminished my fear of rejection which was a by-product of my experiences when I was young. I had relatives who made me feel inferior all the time. Actually, up until adulthood but with God’s grace and the mister’s (then boyfriend) encouragement, I learned to shrug it off. I forgave them without their apologies. I told myself that maybe they do not mean to belittle me. But looking back, I have to admit that yes, they knew exactly what they were doing and they were just mean. I realize that anyone can try to bring us down but it’s entirely up to us how much power we are willing to give them to affect us. Knowing that there will always be people I would not be able to please and who could try to belittle me whether I’m hiding in my cocoon or not, I feel I have nothing to lose but everything to gain should I decide to come out of my shell, unleash what I could offer to the world and share who I really am.
Blogging sets my wings and lets me explore out of my comfort zones. I had an inferiority complex. I was shy. I was afraid to be rejected. Hence, I never revealed my identity in my blogs, not until recently when I already have built the courage and confidence I need. All these I had to face and conquer in order to be a blogger. So I started doing honest and conversational posts. I put a clear profile picture and added my name. I now promote my blog and even requests others to share them. I’m willing to go social, communicate with others, meet fellow bloggers and build relationships. I’m even joining contests! I guess it’s really because I believe that I’ve come full circle. Now is the right time, the perfect time! I open up about my aspirations too and that is to become a writer. These are all an unfamiliar territory which I’m slowly navigating. It makes me nervous and beyond happy at the same time. I guess that’s good, right? It’s liberating, this level-up blogging.
It gives me something to pursue in the future like a formal course in writing. It lets me dream anew and big-time. It makes me want to be better in everything I do. It makes me brave. These days, I’ve been having 100-200 hits per day and getting a handful of likes and shares (links in FB and IG) but rarely any comments. It’s fine, though. I’m happy to write. That’s it for now. Readership will follow soon but if it doesn’t it’s okay since I’m happy with what I’m doing. Blogging definitely adds more bliss and inspiration in my life.
Lastly, blogging partly fulfills my childhood dream and that is to write stories. The child in me had dreamed of writing for Chicken Soup for the Soul. It’s still very far on the horizon but at least I am able to write right now and in the process inspire and help others too, just like my post A Mommy Confession which has touched many readers especially a colleague’s friend. I was amazed on how it affected her. I saw it through her comments in FB.
Blogging life, blogging dreams, blogging journey. I never thought that my blogging will reach this point, a true turning point! Sometimes, it scares the hell out of me that I wanna go back to my cocoon but a larger and better part of me says to just go for it. I only have one life, one passion, one purpose. Thank you, everyone! I know that blissfulthoughts is still not much but I’m very much at a bliss right now! God bless us all.