|My favorite lines from Joyce Meyer’s Devotional. How appropriate?
I never realized how much I lived a free-spirited life until now that I am a few weeks shy from being 30!
It was fun living a carefree life and by that I mean, resigning from my first work without a sure next job (@22), migrating to a foreign land without much thought or planning and going back home in less than a year, working as a cashier, accountant and church-cleaner all at the same time (@25), jumping into an against-all-odds relationship (@23), travels after travels until leave credits exhaustion and that was with or without a budget, piles of plane tickets on my office drawer, ziplines, rafting, unplanned shopping mostly on impulse, impromptu happy hours (@24), grabbing a house loan, leaving comfort zones, drinking spree, sleep-overs and hang-overs, back-packing, exploring remote territories and finally, getting engaged in October only to be married on January of the following year, without a wedding planner, plan or enough preparation (@26).
A year of marriage had taught me a lot about living a more domesticated life (@27). Things started to change a bit but not so much.Then I became a first time mother. The adjustments were so big I almost went crazy (@28). Then came baby no. 2 (@29). More adjustments came, along with more joy, no doubt.
Now that I am turning 30, I sure have grown and matured in so many different ways. For one, I do not drink anymore. I now carefully choose the social events to attend to, even the people to meet-up and the places to go to. My perfect ‘me time’ consists of books, crafts, movies and/or flour. I am slow to anger and frustration. I complain less. I listen more. I have developed my attitude of gratitude. I am (most of the times) at peace, the kind which comes from within. I value spiritual nourishment now more than ever. I now hate too much crowd and too much noise. I also self-imposed an earlier “Cinderella curfew”. I suddenly became afraid of the dark outside. I am confident today in a way I have never been to before and perhaps the most striking maturity affected my emotional and financial well-being. I will not include the spiritual aspect since I believe it’s the longest journey of all (and perhaps never ending) and physical aspects since I honestly do not have time for more exercise other than caring for my 2 children (that’s not so bad, eh?) and I’ve been a ‘low-maintenance’ lady eversince.
Emotionally, I know how to handle my feelings better. I know when to speak-up or when to keep quiet or when to talk less. I am more in-touch with my inner being hence I do not become sad or depressed as easily as before and this applies even during my hormonal periods. And even if I do fall in the pit once more, I already know what to do. For the first time in my life, I am sure of myself and with God’s grace I won’t be easily shaken-up by outside forces. I know my values and principles in life. I know what’s negotiable and what’s not and I’m willing to stand by them and fight for my own choices and opinions. I do credit not just age but also motherhood for all these because once you become a mother you have to live as an example to your children. You want them to be confident, you work on your confidence first (mommy!). I know my worth and it’s not based on anything or anyone. My worth comes from the truth that I am one of God’s beautiful creations (and so are you!).
Financially, I become more aware of my earnings especially with my choice of investments. I study again in order to make sound financial decisions. For the first time in my life (again), I am no longer contented with my dreams. I want to see them come into reality by setting SMART goals. Suddenly I am aiming for something and I am inspired and motivated by my family. I was nothing like this in my 20s. The only adventure I enjoy and pour my self into right now is my financial freedom adventure and yes adventure because I believe there will be ups and downs in this journey. But surprisingly, I am not scared at all.
Maybe that’s what being 30 brings. There is this sense of time ticking away so you just gotta go on and on and on. You cannot afford to lose your precious time doing some blame-game, whining, fickle-mindedness, worrying and scare-paralysis. Suddenly, I am no longer scared to commit a mistake or to fail even. Actually, I want to experience them in such a way that they could serve as a bridge for me to get closer to God’s purpose. All I want is, not to make the same mistakes over and over again, but for new wrongs, I welcome. At 30 I just want to do what I want to do and what I think is best to do for me to achieve my goals and reach my dreams. At 30, I have to bid goodbye to the free-spirited life I once enjoyed and welcome a more disciplined and focused one. A life of discipline and focus seems so fitting for a 30 year old with so much dreams. Gotta stick with my planner this time, at least for my main chunks and let my kids be the only moving factor in it. Oh wow, I therefore declare, I am so ready for pretty 30! 🙂
PS: I am grateful to God for my 30 wonderful years and I claim His promise of more wonderful years ahead. Health, safety and happiness are all I (mainly) pray for, for me and for my loved-ones. To God be the glory and may I live a life pleasing to Him.