I am almost half a year away from home. Six months seem to be a long, long time but for me, it isn’t. It was just as fast as the breeze of the wind that touches my skin right this very moment at our house’s front deck.
It was swift, almost negligible, almost unnoticeable. I have come up a question for myself and me not being able to answer it quickly nor clearly makes me feel sad and bad about myself. =(
The big question: WHAT HAVE CHANGED IN ME?
That was six months, half a year, 26 something weeks, 180++ days, something in me must’ve changed for goodness sake!
So I think, carefully. Okay, I got a new laptop and a new cellphone. I saw snow and had been in some of NZ’s tourist destinations. I’ve got a few dollars in my pocket. I learned how to cook and I’ve been a cashier and a choir member for a short period. That’s all I could think of. Is that all in six months?
So, should I cry now? Big NO. I think again.
Despite the distance, I’ve been closer to my family especially my mom. We now say I love you to each other. I’ve been closer to my friends. I was able to reestablish contact with almost all of them, especially with the long lost ones. I now appreciate MORE what I used to have. I’ve been in love under any other circumstances – good times, tough times. God is good and He made me get through those 6 months of weariness. I believe that I’ll come out of this stronger and wiser. Those, however, are yet to be proven when I’m finally home.
That’s quite a lot already right? I could have done them in the Philippines but I did not. Too busy. Too pre-occupied. Six months I guess is just perfect for me to undergo something I would otherwise not experience had I stayed. I’m still hoping that sooner it’ll become more obvious to me the reasons and the lessons why in just a single step I suddenly found myself in the Pacific region. =)
Maybe, only when I’m back home then I will be able to see clearly what really have changed in me. I hope you guys are there when I find it out. =) In the meantime, here are my small realizations and reminders to oneself:
♥ FAITH IN HIM, FAMILY & FRIENDS & Your OWN SELF would help us overcome the most horrible and terrible phase of our lives. Come to think of it, these things are the real life’s treasures. They can’t be bought or lost.
♥ We should appreciate the things around us ‘cos there are problems & difficulties all over the world! Problems and hardships are endless, countless… hey, that’s why we’re on earth! The challenge is for us to see beauty, peace, a little piece of heaven on Earth and we can start by appreciating our lives, what we have, what’s around us.
♥ Love during the tough times and under prejudices is definitely sweeter. We know that it’s easier to love during good times. The challenge begins during difficult times. It’ll define not how real or how strong Love is but how growing, how promising, how forgiving Love is.
♥ Every day is a chance to grow, to try something new and to become better, stronger and prettier person inside out. We have a life which has an expiration so we need to do things that will make us happy and better persons — a person God wants us to be and a person who is kind, loving and caring.
♥ It pays off to be good to people even if sometimes they’re not good to you. I think the Universe has a way of balancing things. Most likely, people will return the kindness you’ve shown them, but if not, then the Universe will, but if not again, surely HE will, in heaven.
♥ Dreams may die but dreamers do not. In every dream that dies a new one is born. That’s one beauty of humanity and of life.
With all honesty, I’m good in school academics but I’m bad in remembering life’s lessons. ='( I hope this blog of mine would remind me that on this day, I realized the things I stated above. Yeah, I’m guilty, I always lose the lessons along the way, it is just right now that I’m being more cautious with them. And, I know it’s not yet too late.
* I’m just as lost as you are.*